Once More, with Feeling

Fall is here and sorry for this god-awful pun but I am determined to turn over a new leaf. I have a new work schedule that gives me a day off in the middle of the week. I have a shiny tiny Netbook (thanks Sweetie!) light enough to throw in my purse and take to coffee shops, parks, the back yard, or black tie events (in case I get invited to any). Then there’s the death of my mother that has caused the usual, what’s it all about, life is short, wake up and smell the coffee, eat more flax-seed kind of moments. And I have a number of friends who hound me in the most supportive way. I love them for it and hope when my first book is published my advanced age hasn’t caused dementia so I can remember to thank them in the acknowledgements.

But probably more than any of those things, I’m just tired of whining about not writing. I must sound like an idiot. It’s like saying you’re a marathon runner and the most you do is walk your dog around the block.

Unfortunately, I have a long list of things I’ve been trying to accomplish since high school, writing included. Things like not slouching and loosing weight and never going to bed without brushing my teeth. Some people are so good at setting personal goals and accomplishing them. They have dinner at the same time every night and pick out their clothes for the week on Sunday and open a Christmas Club account at the bank and never have to tear their room apart looking for socks that match. And when their doctor says cut back on your salt intake they actually do it. I want to be one of these people but I’m not even close. I wonder if that means my leaves will simply not turn over. Or perhaps I have to do it the AA way, one leaf at a time.

Whatever the case, I’m going to give it another shot. Believe me, I’ve been here before. But eventually, people actually do give up eating after 7pm or hike the entire Appalachian trail or understand what the hell is really going on in the Middle East, right? (yes, all on my list at one time or another)

So what leaf do you keep trying to turn over?

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “Once More, with Feeling

  1. Sally

    You blow me away — making me laugh while exploring a theme painfully close to my heart! Keep writing!

  2. I keep saying I’m going to – and I keep not doing it. If you figure out the cure to this, let me know! Nice post, thanks.

  3. I think the entire blogging community feels you. At least you’re starting somewhere.

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